Images and sources via links on my the curves pinboard
I need positive images of women in my daily life. As well as positive attitudes. I have changed a great deal physically and emotionally since adolescence about my self image. I've always been chubby or curvy if you will, but I haven't always been ok with that. I feel that with age I just seem to like myself and my body more even with stretch marks, and imperfections. I try to waste as little time as possible complaining or pointing out said imperfections. I really do not understand why so many women do that constantly. I try to stay positive....But I have my days. Some people tend to project their own negative insecurities on others. Today someone I work with said I should not eat too much because I was gaining weight. This coming from a person, who is a healthy weight, by the way, but who obsesses constantly about being skinny. I'm so not that person anymore. I have moved on from that, sure I would love to loose a couple lumps and bumps but basically I think I look good. Normally I would just brush it off, because Panamanians tend to notice whether you gain or lose an 1/8th of a pound....and tell you about it. So basically I have learned not to listen. However, today it rubbed me the wrong way. Maybe because she said it as I was offering her some of my gold fish crackers or because I have been feeling fatter and have been going through a leggings/dresses/flip flops phase. Though I adamantly blame the weather.....because when it gets too hot to think and I'm pretty much feel like all clothes are evil and too tight and only feel OK when I'm in A) an air conditioned environment or B) fresh out of the shower, in my underwear and in front of the fan drinking ice water. Anyway, I figured might as well post it and get it off my mind. So here are some positive images of CURVY women.
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2 comments:
I love this post! It's exactly how I feel! But I am learning to accept it, and with accepting it I have come to love my curves! We all have friends who wish they had them :)
Don't let that person get you down or affect you in any negative way. You are beautiful!
I’m sorry about your snarky coworker- it really isn’t any of her business and I wish I could tell her so in some very distinct and expletive laden terms. Your beautiful and you know that. You've fought for that knowledge. I got a similar feeling a few weeks ago when someone posted “80% of weight loss is diet based. Don’t fall off the wagon!” on facebook. Maybe the poster was only talking about themselves (and I would argue that your coworker is probably only really talking about her own anxiety and it has nothing to do with you) but I felt it reflected back at me and not in a positive light. It made me upset because I felt shamed. It’s amazing how women’s food choices and our body choices have become wrapped up as yet another aspect of shame. Women body shame constantly because we are repeatedly told that it’s a priority. We’re told that by our peers, we’re told that by our parents (or, at least some of us are), and we are certainly told that by an absolute onslaught of images displaying exclusively thin, white, rich women as beautiful. In America, it’s made even worse by the fact that fat is now pathologized- you’re not only seen as less desirable than the popular beauty standards but you’re also sick. It’s a social preoccupation that I find incredibly draining. What could women do with their lives, with the actual health of their minds and bodies, if we didn’t force ourselves into the anxiety of not accepting our bodies regardless of shape?
Part of me has a hard time because, while I have struggled with considering my body as acceptable, I have never struggled with weight. I am not as thin as the beauty ideal, sometimes I curse my bumps and my boobs and my post baby pooch. Not nearly as much as I used to though and it takes so much practice to not back slide into that absolute waste of energy. I also don’t want to force my opinions about bodies and tell someone what to do with her body. If she wants to set a goal and lose weight (like my facebook friend), that’s her choice and that’s her body. When I get upset that people are telling me how my body needs to look, how can I demand the same alteration from them? Body acceptance is accepting your body and other’s bodies regardless of shape, or health, or ability. It’s radical and it takes practice.
And some blogs for your thoughts-
http://curveappeal.tumblr.com/page/2
http://danceswithfat.wordpress.com/2011/06/22/size-acceptance-actually-means-size-acceptance/
http://curvesahead.tumblr.com/
love you
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